Friday, January 15, 2016

Monica Kozisek and Greg Kozisek

Monica Kozisek breaks me up.

Even in high school, she is queen of the one-liners. Her quips during English class make me laugh so hard that sometimes I have coughing spasms. But I am the teacher. Should we be having so much fun? It doesn't matter. If Monica's in class, everybody has fun.

She is the eleventh of 12 children. Or, as she likes to remind her siblings, "I'm number one. Twice."

Greg and Monica, Christmas 2015
Her crazy sisters Alice, Margaret and Barb are her best friends. But as well, she is part of a tightly knit group of friends in the Grand Island Central Catholic Class of 1982. They are some of my very favorite kids. Perhaps because my own sister Mary is in that class or maybe because I am so young myself, I enjoy those kids to no end.

Mary and Monica play volleyball for Coach Sharon Zavala. I am an assistant coach. As much fun as those girls have practicing and playing together, there is a grit to them that is unusual. Several of them have suffered tragedy in their families. My sister has just lost our mother. Karla Rork loses her brother. Monica has lost her 14-year-old sister to complications from diabetes.

It is the 80's, though, a time in which we don't talk much about the heavy burdens in our lives. After Monica's sister Mary dies, the Koziseks continue with their lives. Monica knows her parents are suffering, but they do not speak of Mary. Volleyball becomes Monica's lifeline. She and her teammates leave their heartbreak and difficulties at home and abandon themselves to the sport.

Everybody is delighted for these nice girls when they earn a berth to the state tournament in Lincoln. Nobody expects too much. So it is nothing less than astonishing when Central Catholic claws its way to the finals. Monica's mother and sisters send a note scrawled with loving messages to Lincoln with her. Although Monica is a bench player for most of the season, inside her something comes alive. She wants this state championship more than anything. By the end of the state tourney, Monica is a crucial starter with a determined focus and a killer serve.

She and her team will win the school's first ever state volleyball title. The Central Catholic faithful is frenzied with excitement. Suddenly, anything becomes possible, and there is a seismic shift in girls' sports at GICC. For the next 30 years, little sixth grade girls enrolling at Central Catholic will believe they, too, can achieve the impossible. After the historic 1981 win, eight more teams will go on to win the big title for Coach Sharon Zavala and GICC.

Monica Kozisek believes she can do anything, too. She is only the second of her brothers and sisters to graduate from college. Although she earns a teaching degree, she discovers she prefers sales. Eventually, she becomes a lottery sales rep for IGT and enjoys both teaching store clerks the business and the camaraderie she shares with her clients.

Monica is in her 30's living in Lincoln, however, when she loses her lovely mother. It is up to her and her sisters to keep the big Kozisek family together, and they care for their father and organize holiday gatherings. But Monica misses her mother and yearns for more in her own life.

"Please," she prays to both God and her mother, "give me a new direction."

As if in answer to her prayer, the life of foster care presents itself. Monica plunges in. During the months ahead, she cares for five or so foster children for sporadic weekends until permanent shelter can be arranged. One day, however, a six-year-old boy with big dark eyes comes to her clenching a small bag in his hand. He is called Greg.They appraise each other.

"Would you like to watch a movie?" Monica asks.

Before they settle down, he carefully puts away his clothes and situates his room. Monica is amazed at the enormous courage it takes for a small boy to walk into a strange home. They settle down to watch the movie. Greg looks at her.

"I was hoping you'd be hotter," he says. They suddenly laugh, and Monica knows she's been gifted with a kid whose humor is as quirky as her own.

But it is a long process for Greg to develop trust. A self-reliant little boy, he has grown up as the youngest of several siblings. His own mother collapses under the weight of her struggles. Every morning, Greg wakes himself up and makes his own breakfast. Then he walks to the bus stop to go to his Lincoln public school. His mother has not registered him for the first grade, but Greg will not let that deter him. He presents himself to the school office, a small grave boy, and waits patiently for whatever must be accomplished to allow him to attend school.

Now he does not quite believe that Monica will take care of these important details. One day, he comes down with the stomach flu and is forced to stay home.  "You have to call the school!" he urges Monica. "Don't forget to let my day care know!"

She reassures him. "I know what to do, Greg." When he finally understands he does not have to be a first grade adult, Greg visibly relaxes. He excels in school, transforms into an exuberant little boy, and grows closer and closer to Monica.

When it becomes clear that Greg's own mother will not be able to care for him, Monica and Greg make the monumental decision to officially become a family. After a long and emotional wait, the adoption becomes finalized, and Monica and Greg, along with Monica's sisters, assemble at the Lincoln courthouse for the big day. In the austere courtroom, heavy tables are lined with microphones. Clowning, Monica's crazy sister Barb speaks into what she believes is a dead mic.

"Excuse me, Senator, but I refuse to answer the question." She is mortified to hear her own voice echoing back and leaps away from the microphone. Somehow it adds to the flavor of the whole crazy day. Greg realizes with a shock these funny, wonderful women are now his family.

It is almost nine years since the fateful day a little dark eyed boy arrived at Monica Kozisek's door. She and Greg now live in Grand Island. Monica wants him to be closer to aunts and uncles and cousins. As well, she wants him to graduate from her own alma mater, Grand Island Central Catholic.

It has not always been easy for Monica, a single mother, to scrape together the tuition for a Catholic school. She is grateful for the school's financial aid, scholarships and work study which have made Greg's education very affordable. "All you have to do is ask," Monica says. Whatever sacrifices are required on her part, she says, are completely worth it.

Greg feels his life opening up before him at Central Catholic. As he learns about his faith, he also experiences the joy of belonging to a tightly knit school community. He is a high honor roll student, an athlete, and most of all, he is a boy who is loved by his mother.

There was a time in his young life when Greg Kozisek worried relentlessly about every new uncertain moment. Now he looks forward to his future without fear. "God helps us. He's always been there for me," Greg says, "and he put me on the right track."

Someday, he says, he hopes to have a solid job and a solid family. Like the one he belongs to now. "I just want to be happy," Greg says.

Long ago, such a thing would have seemed impossible. But his good mother has taught him otherwise.

With a little faith, she assures him, anything is possible.